Sweetest form of carnage

Dear Men in Blue,

Congratulations on the series win. Also? This time might actually be one of the few times I've thoroughly enjoyed being proved wrong. Although the Men in White might prove to be a different proposition, so. you know.

And, God help me, I'm getting used to the new colour.

Yours in confused congratulation,
M.

Dear Peter McGlashan,

Forget the Pathans and the Husseys and the McCullums, you and your sister are the coolest pair of siblings in international cricket. 'Nuff said.

Yours in enthusiasm,
M.

Dear Indian bowlers,

Please to be getting your backs into it. At least, you know, in the Tests - where you know, batting's not always going to be around to save the day.

And also, Ishant? Please to be watching where you land that front foot of yours.

Munaf? The pitch is 22 yards. Not 25.

Yours in some concern,
M.

Dear Dhoni,

You know that thing aside from captaincy and batting that you are pencilled into the team for? Yeah, that one. The one that's been steadily deteriorating over the past six months.

Please to be regaining the pretty skills with the gloves. The team can't afford you not to.

Yours in rare admonishment,
M.

Dear Daniel Vettori,

You may be the coolest New Zealander I know (and I know a surprising number of New Zealanders), but the Indian batsmen are now riding a whole new different level of Cool. It might be a whole new world of Cool. A different parallel universe of Cool. An astral plane of...

Now I forgot what I really wanted to say.

Yours in supposed sympathy,
M.

Dear Sehwag,

Please to be continuing with your awesomeness. Anything else I can say only cheapens the joy of watching you tear the opposition attack to pieces, chew them, spit them on the sidewalk and then grind them into the cement with steel-tipped boots for good measure.

Yours in speechless awe,
M.

Dear VirunGauti,

You are not an opening pair anymore, you are a phenomenon. Please to be occuring more often.

Yours in exhilarating anticipation,
M.

Dear Mithali Raj,

To have scored 75* in a team total of 137/7 in a World Cup game - which the team went on to win by 35 runs, by the way - makes you about seven and a half different kinds of awesome. Please to be continuing lifting the India Women's batting.

Yours in deep appreciation,
M.

Dear Person who's managed to read this far,

Thank you for bearing with this drivel.

Yours in deep, deep gratitude,
M.

Here's to an ODI whitewash and a Test series win in Downer Under!